Going It Alone

Everyone knows that doing something with a buddy makes things easier, more enjoyable and more successful. When the gang's on board, all that mutual support makes a difference.

Unfortunately, after almost a year of implementing a new mindset, my "gang", aka my husband, is still merrily doing as he's always done and steadily gaining weight.

It's not that my husband eats "badly". He eats a balanced diet, rarely consumes soft drinks or junk food and has made a real effort to introduce more veggies into his life. He just eats too much. I wouldn't say that he wolfs his food down, but he eats large forkfuls steadily, with few pauses and goes back for seconds almost all the time. On the exercise front, he walks about 1/2 hour every day, but does nothing else. Thank goodness, he doesn't smoke (never has) and has no more than 2 beers a week and the odd small glass of wine.

Like most women, I can't keep my mouth shut all the time, but after 21 years together it has become abundantly clear that he will not step an inch outside his comfort zone. I have begged and cajoled him for years to just go for a check-up at the doctor's. He promises but has so far failed to ever go--in 21 years. I honestly think he's scared of facing up to the truth. He might also have an irrational fear that if he goes for a check-up, he too will end up with a myriad of health problems like his wife (aka me). In his world, what he doesn't know won't hurt him...He's a lot more like his mother than he'd ever admit.

I think that if I could lead the way with exercise, he would follow along. But as you all know, that's impossible. I can't go biking, he won't go biking on his own. I can't go to the gym, he certainly won't go on his own. We do enjoy walking together, but since I can only walk at a leisurely pace, it's not really exercise.

He is also not a guy who hangs out with his buddies at the gym. He's got friends, but no one particularly close and the friends he does see are the kind of people who believe in good conversation and a good beer. I can't think of one person he knows who's at all physically active. In fact, all his friends and/or acquaintances are slightly to moderately to quite overweight.

My husband is a really intelligent guy, a nerd, in fact, who hangs out with equally nerdy people. Really nice, but really nerdy.

Have you ever been to a science-fiction convention? Have you ever been surrounded by thousands of pasty-faced, overweight people lost in a world of space ships and aliens? OK, they're not all like that. Many of them are in fact fascinating, intelligent people. The fact remains, however, that I was really struck by the general unhealthiness of the attendees at the World Science Fiction Convention, this past summer in Montreal. And these are basically the people he hangs with--if he's not hanging with university math and physics professors (another group known for its interest in health and fitness LOL).

On Sunday, I ambushed dear hubby in the hallway while both boys were out. I politely gave him a piece of my mind (no, I won't go into details) on how he is shirking his own personal health responsibilities. On Monday, I was at my GP's (perhaps more on that at a later date) and her secretary has been put on high alert, waiting for him to call. His last name is French (we don't share the same last name) and horribly hard to pronounce for someone not used to the language. The secretary is on the lookout for someone introducing himself as my husband. Pretty funny.

Now, he just has to call..........................................