Is Hallowe'en Scary?

There's lots of talk about Hallowe'en in the weight-o-sphere. Some see it as the first day of the hardest season of the year--a time when the floodgates open and junk food rushes in, aided and abetted by the overeating monster. Who needs a costume when you can gussy up that fatsuit all by yourself!

This year, I'm not feeling particularly worried. I will go out and buy a few bags of candy for the kiddies. I don't know whether my boys are planning to go out or not (they're both teenagers now). Maybe I'll get them to man the front door. I just hate jumping up and down to answer the door, especially when it's cold out.

I promise you, I WILL eat a few of those wonderful little packs. I'll probably stick to what I love the most: chocolate. I will enjoy what I eat. I will savour what I eat. I will not inhale it. And I'll make it my treat, not my meal.

Can I trust myself? I think so. A few weeks ago, my younger son had his birthday party. His birthday's actually in the summer, but we celebrate either earlier or later so that he can invite all his school buddies. One of D.'s friends brought him--I kid you not--about a half a dozen bags of candy as a gift. I was not amused, but what's a mom to do? When your kid is 14, you can't just grab the bags and throw them out. At that age, they should have a say. So D. took his favourite candies and hid them away. He eats a few from his stash every day. There were, however, some little licorice pellets that he left out for the guests and there were a lot left over after the party. I put them in a Tupperware in the pantry. I guess I'm like most of us--I hate to throw out food. No one has eaten those candies except me. Every few days, I take a handful and try to eat one at a time. And that's it. It's enough for me. There's still about a week's worth of candy left.

So that's why I'm not worried about Hallowe'en. And since we'll have much better candy in the house for awhile, I might even throw away the rest of the licorice candies. They're OK, but not great.

Are you worried about Hallowe'en?

I Lurve Gok

(Image from The Sun newspaper.)

Gok Wan is a British fashion consultant who hosts a fabulous TV show called "How to Look Good Naked". He's flamboyant, gay, and I think he's one of the only TV personalities on the air right now who truly loves and accepts women as they are. He helps heavy, often out-of-shape ladies to see how beautiful they really are. Some may think this is a bad idea. Gok doesn't lecture them on their weight, or tell them that if they only got in shape and ate better, their lives and their health would improve immeasurably. Instead, he helps them to love themselves as they are in the here and now.

I totally agree with Gok's approach. I really don't think you can make positive changes in your life if your starting point is self-loathing. "I'm such a fat pig. I've got such ugly legs and bat-wing arms" and on, and on it goes. Self-image is so deeply rooted in one's psyche that no matter how many changes do take place, often the individual doesn't see them and continues to view him or herself as ugly, undeserving and profoundly unworthy. If you haven't transformed your mind and your attitude towards yourself, the physical transformation likely won't last very long and you'll be back where you started: in physically and emotionally bad shape...with a few extra pounds to spare!

It's a fine line to tread. You have to accept yourself as you are today if you want to make a real, long-lasting change.

So, I "lurve" Gok, as they say in Britain. And I lurve him even more, knowing that he was once extremely overweight himself. According to the Wikipedia entry, he lost a huge amount of weight in a short time by crash dieting--which certainly isn't the way I do things. But I lurve him nevertheless because he too has been there and done that and the love and compassion he shows for the women he works with is just so beautiful.

Blowing Off Steam

What do you do when you're accused of asking for too many favours when it's actually the accuser who does this all the time?

Another Fad Diet

What's the secret to losing weight? Yes, the REAL secret, the one that's going to change your life? Are you ready? Is the suspense killing you?

In the long run, no matter how you do it, the answer is simple: eat less, move more.

So naturally, I was both unsurprised and dissappointed to see an article on the latest fad diet to hit the newspapers and the wallets of people seeking the magic weight loss bullet: the cookie diet.

I read this article a few days ago in the Globe and Mail, but here it is in the New York Times. Read it and weep. Yes, any diet will work if you stick to it religiously, but come on, or should I say "puhleez"? Fifty-six US greenbacks a week for cookies plus one real meal a day? I don't call this a diet. In my opinion, it's just another recipe for disordered eating.

About 14 years ago, I did one of those "two shakes a day plus one real meal" plans. My husband even joined me and we both lost weight. I bet you know that we gained all that weight back and some extra weight to boot. And rather quickly, as I recall.

It always bears repeating: to lose weight, you have to eat real food. Restricting yourself to cookies, bananas, grapefruit or special bars is ridiculous. OK, if it works for you, great. But you're probably one in a million.

I hope that today, you'll all be eating real, nutritious food in reasonable quantities and moving your body any way you want. And if you really need it, save some room for a cookie, just don't make it your whole meal!

I've Always Been Fat (Or at Least Thought I Was)

I have always felt there is a difference in approach and attitude to weight loss depending on whether you're going back to your previous non-heavy self or aiming for something completely new.

I was always a chubby child--never grossly overweight, but definitely chubby. I grew into a chubby, non-athletic teenager. I hated gym, not because I didn't like to move, but because I was just not a gifted (or even decent) athlete. Knowing that you will always be chosen last in team sports does not make you look forward to gym class.

I never ever looked anywhere near the norm: no flat stomach or long, lean legs for me! The fact is, though, that many people--even when their weight is perfectly fine--just don't fit the norm. Objectively speaking, there have been times in my life when my weight was perfectly acceptable. But I have always had a bit of a paunch, even at a good weight for me. Of course, when I've been at a higher weight, the paunch is bigger. Bottom line, though: the paunch is always there and believing that I'm going to get rid of it without a tummy tuck is just wishful thinking.

So I have two questions:

How do you imagine yourself in a slimmer body, when you don't really feel you've ever had that body?

And perhaps even more importantly, are you trying to love your body as it is now and as it will be when you get down to the weight you want--even if you still don't look like a fashion model?

The Biggest Loser: My Take

I'm now on Day 2 of my weekend resting marathon, continuing to lie in bed (a little grammar note: you lie, not lay, in bed--maybe one day I'll bend your ears with an explanation of that common error...) and trying desperately to avoid total frustration!

For better or for worse, we have a TV in our bedroom, a leftover from my many months of convalescence from two surgeries a few years ago. In the past day and a bit, I have been spending too much time watching TV. This morning, I decided to swallow my bile and watch "The Biggest Loser", more or less from start to finish. In my opinion, it was disgusting.

TBL is an entertainment program that thinks it's rendering a public service. The media is all abuzz with America's obesity crisis so it's not surprising that an enterprising network soul decided to cash in on the hysteria and create TBL. Ooh, what fun! Pitting people against each other, tears, fake praise ("this guy is like a brother to me, the best person I've ever known...but here's your name--oops, your head--on a platter and you're out of here"), anger, insults and the promise that finally, you, the fat slob, will come out of the fatsuit and emerge as a beautiful swan.

I've got to digress here. TBL reminds me so much of a character in the Archie comic books. I don't remember her name and I don't know if she's still part of the Archie cast of characters, but does anyone remember the ugly, fat girl? I remember an issue where this girl was somehow transformed into a gorgeous, perfectly coiffed and dressed slim girl. Then, just as suddenly, the beautiful body burst apart and out emerged the ugly, fat girl that everyone knew and (didn't) love. The transformation had been real, but only temporary and the poor girl had to go back to her miserable, fat existence.

Of course, this is not the message that TBL is trying to transmit. However, that is precisely what will no doubt happen to a number of the contestants and viewers. Instantaneous just doesn't work. And by "instantaneous", I mean the length of one TV season. Creating a radical change by taking people out of their normal environment and imposing a totally unrealistic regimen of diet and exercise on them will yield quick results...quick and usually fleeting.

I was also horrified to see how destructive it is to a person's self-esteem to "only" lose a pound or two in a week. On the episode I just watched this is exactly what happened to two of the women contestants. I think that one must never forget the influence of monthly hormonal fluctuation on women's weight loss. It can never be overstated. I saw two women crushed by their failure. OK, maybe they were "asked" by the producer to look so crestfallen, but this is not healthy, either for them and for viewers, who I suspect often know little about the factors that make for consistent and permanent weight loss.

Superficial and psychologically violent--TBL is a big winner for the network and its advertisers. Is it a significant player in helping people to reach better physical and psychological health? I think not.

Hip Non-Update

First, thanks for the words of encouragement! It really helps.

I faxed my surgeon a message on Friday, since it's really hard to reach his secretary on the phone. I'm hoping to hear from his office with an appointment date at the beginning of the week.

My yoga teacher basically spent an hour doing breathing exercises with me yesterday. She's also put on my total bed rest for the weekend. I'm typing this on my netbook while reclining in bed. I hate this!

In the meantime, I've got a few subjects that I'd like to talk about here and hopefully that will keep me from going totally stir crazy!